You are allowed

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Have you ever been in a kind of situation that you regret? Or ever been jealous of someone?  Or felt miserable about yourself?
Doesn't it feel embarrassing to admit this? To admit the worst fear of yours? To be in a position where you compare yourself or you compare the situation and feel the worst!

I admit I have felt this way, multiple times. I have felt I'm no good. I felt what I'm doing will take me nowhere. I also have been stuck in a situation like this for a long time where all that I thought about myself was something miserable. My morning had negative thoughts, I couldn't gulp enough food, I felt no enthusiasm except when I accepted the facts. And by facts I mean to say the real facts, not what all the negatives that I had in my mind.

For years, I had been living my life on one fact "LIFE MANAGES and everything falls into place", so for years, I took the situations for granted. I put the burden on the situations to get resolved on their own. Until recently I discovered, its not life who manages, It's us who adjust! It's us who has to make a place for the situation to fall into or we have to shrink the situation to let it fit. So ultimately, what I discovered with my experiences in life is that it's us who is responsible for how we look at things and how we let them influence us. But it isn't always as easy as it sounds. Having discovered doesn't mean to have absorbed. Strange, isn't it? We know what's right, but we do not implement it! We cannot just let it work the way we know is right! Such an irony!

Then how is it that a person should react? or behave? or implement? or work it out?
Doesn't it take a lot from us to adjust already than to even work on how to make it work? Often when I get questions like these in my mind, the only way I make myself understand and calm down is to accept what's real and to give myself enough freedom to feel it. Certain questions just don't have answers and I feel these kinds of situations doesn't even deserve enough time to waste upon. A lot of people enter the denial phase where they cannot just accept the facts and the major reason that I believe for this should be a personal loss of their own. Like being lesser than someone compared with or being jealous of someone looking better or to envy the goods happening to someone else. These sound like some very small situations in our life but they do influence us. And these have no answers because these are facts and I can let them have a negative impact on me by being a refuser. Or rather, I can accept and be upset about it, cry about it and just move on. Because certain situations and facts can just not change, even if you try the hardest.

It is okay to grieve and cry sometimes. It is really okay to let the anger come out without being fearful about the outcome. It is okay to be who you are rather than denying. It is absolutely okay to let the truth seep in. It is okay to be not okay about what you don't want to accept. It is all okay and you are okay!
You are allowed to feel bad and worse sometimes or maybe regret about it later. You are allowed to make mistakes and be angry about them. You are allowed to cry loud and scream and let it all out that you think you aren't or you can never be. You are allowed to hit the lows. Life is too short to be in the denial phase or to keep things inside because these do not deserve the place where they aren't fitting. They have to be out, and that is how you will adjust. That is how you will shrink the situation to let it fit, or else it will keep on putting the pressure because you never worked on it to fit in.

You have to break down to rebuild yourself. And you are allowed to feel it!

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